“Today You are You”

Me at 64.
Me at 64.

The title comes from one of my favorite authors, Dr. Seuss and his book: Happy Birthday to You! I borrowed my title from these lines:”Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you! ”

First about boobs

We women don’t stop and realize what a practical part of the female body our breasts are. In our early years girls see their tatas as a sign of their impending womanhood.

Depending on the attitude and self image of their owner, breasts may be “morale boosters” or they may be “dead weights.” Part of accepting your body and therefore your bosom depends on your mother’s attitude, part on the attitude of  your peers and of course your own perception of your own girls and body.

When I was growing up many teenagers were taught not to show their girls off nor their cleavage because, heaven forbid, it might incite some passionate young man to lose control! (Not even good reasoning but I was born in 1951 during the dark ages; right before the liberating ’60s and the “go with the flow” ’70s, when so many attitudes about our bodies and sex changed. Attitudes have changed towards breasts but I still think we should view them as the amazing parts of our bodies that they are and not be ashamed of them.

I always kept my girls under wraps, just because that was the way I was brought up. There was also the factor of my lack of confidence and poor self image. I have always been a little on the heavy side and figured, “Who, besides my husband would be interested in a “fluffy woman?”. (Just to make a point here, I was 5’7″ and weighed 145 pounds when I was 22. I would kill to weigh that now!!)

So  after dating,  marrying, and helping my husband through a Masters Degree and then a Doctorate, we decided to start our family and the tatas came in pretty handy in that process.

The multi purpose boobies!

Later they were the topics of interest while I was pregnant because I wanted to breast feed our baby. (I am sorry if this embarrasses you, Son!!) So they served a very useful purpose in nurturing our son as nice portable, no muss, no fuss containers for his nourishment during his infancy.

Then for years they just kind of “hung around” waiting to see what was going to happen next.  As is the case for many of us, as we age they get a little bigger and droopier.  As I got older I thought of them as a nice balance for my broadening hips, thinking, “Well at least I am balanced:”big on top and on the bottom, which makes my waist look a little smaller (Right?) ”

On to the rest of our bodies

After retiring from nursing and the subsequent wearing of uniforms or (for the most part) “asexual scrubs” for thirty eight years, I am enjoying dressing in what I consider feminine though reasonably priced nice clothes.

I took an interest in “painting the barn,” so to speak, to look nicer as my confidence improved. This started when I became the owner of a small photography business several years ago and wanted to look more like a business woman.
During that time I took on several surprising jobs as a photojournalist, volunteer at the local chamber of commerce, and several smaller jobs.

Older with a different perspective

Now that I am an older woman, widowed for over five years I am reconsidering how I feel about my breasts. (For all of you who don’t know me: “No I am not going to go out there and flash every one nor am I going to lean over to display my cleavage!”)

What I am feeling more and more is that I am proud of my girls! Several years ago I was told by a female mammography technician, “For a woman your age they are in very good shape.” Well, that made my day!!

I am no longer shy about wearing scoop necked or v-necked tops. I no longer self consciously check to be sure all buttons are buttoned on my tops even when I have no reason to worry.

I have a growing acceptance of my body

I am finally accepting my body, “fluffy ” though it may be and liking it. (I know I need to lose weight but I have kept my weight the same within a few pounds for several years now.) I stay active and am enjoying my life.

In observing other women my age I am realizing there will always be other women who are smaller than I am and there will always be women who are bigger than I am. There will always be women who are smarter than I am and there will always be women who are not as smart as I am.

Stop judging yourself

The point is to all of my sisters in the world, stop judging yourself by other people. You are you. There is no one exactly like you. Learn to love yourself and improve where you can and accept what you can’t change. Learn to be happy! That is more important than who has the most beautiful face, the best voice, the most talent, the biggest house, the richest husband or your own biggest company, or the youngest boobs!

There are people who have all of these things whether through surgery or by nature and many of them are not happy, loving people.

Just be the best you!

So stop looking at bony models and thinking you need to be thinner; stop looking at glam girls in makeup advertisements with enough make up for 10 women on their faces and wishing you could be as “beautiful?” as they are.

You are unique. There is only one you in the world. Rejoice in your uniqueness. Spruce up and take care of what you have and be thankful for the important things in life: love, friends and family, inner beauty, the world of nature, the love of a pet, the amazing technological world we live in now. Be thankful and take good care of what you have.

I am enjoying my life, my home, my family and friends, my cats, my health, my world. Why shouldn’t I enjoy my body as an expression of who I am: a comfortable, confident (or getting there) fun loving, intelligent woman who is looking forward to the rest of her life.

 

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12 thoughts on ““Today You are You”

  1. What a positive outlook, Joy. My girls came late…at 18, along with the first period. As a late bloomer, they were embarrassing to me when they did arrive. I’m very protective and hide them, mostly. I had to laugh at your 145. When I was 30, I went on my first diet. I was at 130 and thought I was out of control (5 ft 6 in.) !! How foolish we were. ☺

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  2. Isn’t it nice to be at peace with your body? It takes a long time to get there but it is totally wonderful when it happens. I try to remind myself everyday that I will never look younger or prettier than I do right at this moment.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The funny thing to me is I believe we are more attractive when we believe we are attractive. It changes how we carry ourselves, but more important it is a part of that “extra something” that people see when they see us…like the little glint in the eye they add into movies with special effects! Anyway, I’ve sure that right now with your new attitude about yourself you are more beautiful that ever! Jo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Joanne Eddy!! You are so right about the way we carry ourselves. I noticed when I feel good, I carry myself differently. I think we affect those around us to by how we feel about ourselves. Thank you!!

      Liked by 1 person

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