Have you ever noticed that you never see a bug sitting on your windshield until you have gotten into the car, put on your seat belt, and started the car? Well, this is what happened to me yesterday.
I got into my Beetle, seat belted myself in and started the engine. There it was: a small, winged, large ant-like insect perched on my windshield. I thought about the many times before when I had seen other insects under the same circumstances. Previously I thoughtlessly started the engine and just hoped they would realize their imminent danger and fly away.
As many times as I started off like this before I had never thought about what might be going through the little life forms’ minds. Did they sense they were in danger or could they even tell their short little lives could possibly be made shorter if they didn’t fly away while they were able.
This time seemed different. I pondered whether I should get out and shoo him off the window. After I adopted the wait and see option, many thoughts “psychically” flooded my mind from the mind of this tiny insect (or was it creativity streaming from my own mind?) See what you think. Do I have a loose screw that enables me to tune in on bug brains? Or do I just have a loose screw?
The thoughts of the insect:
At 25 MPH: Woohoo! A free ride!
At 35 MPH: Wonder how fast this baby can go?
At 40 MPH: I am a strong bug! I can hold on, no matter what!
At stoplight: Should I stay or should I go??
Resuming 40 MPH: Woohoo! Flying faster than any other bug!!
At 45 MPH: How much longer can I hold on?
Wow! The wind is really whipping my wings around. I could fly really fast if I could make my wings flap like this!!
At 50 MPH: I hope my wings don’t get ripped off!
If the bug were a Star Trek fan he might be thinking in the voice of Star Trek’s engineer, Scotty, “I canna hold on much longer! My wings canna take the strain!”
Should I jump off now or wait to see how long I can hang on?
Good bye giant bug bus!
Before leaving: Should I get out and shoo the bug away? Sigh, maybe he will just fly away.
At 15 MPH: How fast will I have to go before that bug gets blown off?
At 25 MPH: How long can he stay on the windshield?
At 35 MPH: Wow, I am going and he’s still hanging on.
At 40 MPH: What is he holding onto to stay on the windshield? Is the windshield glass porous that he can hang on with his tiny little feet so well?
Good, a stoplight. Maybe he will just fly away now so I won’t feel guilty for literally and proverbially “throwing him under the bus.”
Resuming 40 MPH: Nope, he is still hanging on. Should I turn on the windshield wiper to flip him off the windshield?
No, can’t do that! The last time I tried that it smeared the poor bug along the path of the wiper blade!
Doing 45 MPH. I see his little wings fluttering with the force of the wind. He is hanging on.
Doing 55 MPH: Maybe the force of the air hitting my car is making him flatten against the windshield and that’s why he’s staying put?
How is he still there? Does he have little suction cups on his tiny little feet?
Next time I look where he had been I find that he is gone.
A little over 55 MPH! Wow, he held on till 55 MPH!
I hope his wings didn’t get blown off by the wind! That would be a terrible fate for him!
I hope he just took off flying.
That may have been an exhilarating experience which fulfilled his dream to fly faster than any other bug!
Or maybe he was terrified out of his little bug brain! Oh, shoot! Now I feel guilty.
Next time, I will get the little critter off of my windshield before I start the engine so I won’t have so many thoughts crowded into my brain and so much guilt!!!
After these rapid fire thoughts poured into my brain, I decided I had spent enough time thinking about this little bug. He chose to hang on to the windshield after a slow start to give him a chance to fly away. He must have wanted a fast ride or been a thrill seeker. (There are bugs like that you know.) Maybe it is an honor to die at a faster speed than any of his relatives had flown?
No, I am not going crazy. We don’t know what these little creatures are capable of. His father, mother, sister and brother and cousins may come after me for revenge!! But they will have to catch me first!!
Allow me to clarify something. I am a lover of nature and creatures of all kinds. I love bugs and would never torture one under any circumstances. And I would never kill one if I could help it, unless it was a bad, invasive or harmful kind of bug.