One Son By Another Mother

My first son, M, met a friend, D, while riding home on the school bus from junior high school. D was the son of another family. He lived about a mile away but often rode the school bus home with M. When they met, D was in junior high and M was in 10th grade(?). They both had common problems at school. They bonded over their common issues and a love of art and anime. M and D were, what D called, “disaffected.” I had to look that up. It means disgruntled (or dissatisfied) with a system or those in charge.

D would come home with M several times a week. I always fixed him a snack and something to drink, just like I did M. My husband and I enjoyed his presence on the visits. Since I worked 7PM to 7 AM at the hospital, I was always at home to greet them with refreshments.

My husband, H, liked D too. He invited D’s coming with us on local trips sometimes. D even came to our house to get ready for his first prom. He borrowed M’s top hat. It was so fun to have two boys enjoying each other’s friendship.

I found out later that while I was working evening/night shift, D and my husband talked on the phone often. M graduated before D and moved out with some friends. D, later, told me how my husband had talked with him about religion, government, and computers. D later after his degrees got a job with the government as an Level 2 computer programmer and more.

D met his future wife Ca in junior high school. She was a year older but they fell in love and dated for two or three years. Then they made plans for getting degrees after they graduated from high school. Ca went on to college and helped clear the path for D to come there too. Then they moved to Western Carolina University and lived together for a couple of years before they married. My husband performed the wedding. They each finished their degrees and then earned a master’s degree from an online college. Ca has a doctorate in Public Education (?) and D his training as a high level programmer for the state of North Carolina.They lived in a couple of places during that time and finally bought a house in Eastern North Carolina.

They now have three children, L and F who are the 6 and 4 year old boys and a little girl, E, who is almost two. They have a large yard with lots of things to do and chickens in the coup where they can get eggs. They also have a vegetable and flower garden in the back yard.

My husband and I were both fond of D. My husband passed after health complications in 2009. At my husband’s funeral, I asked D and his wife if they wanted to sit with M and I at the front of the chapel to sort of announce how M and I felt about D and his sweet wife. I wanted everyone to know that we loved them like family. D’s mother died from a tumor and his biological father from some other disease over two years after the funeral.

I had talked with M before my husband’s funeral about formally adopting D. M agreed since D’s parents had both passed away, that I could proceed with the adoption paper work. So I happily began the process of adopting D. When I received the new birth certificates (one for him and one for me), I proudly gave him the new birth certificate with his birthdate and my name as his mother.

When D looked for his birth certificate, he found out that the “Estes paper curse” had struck him earlier; making it seem to me like he was meant to be an Estes and “the stork” made a mistake. His birthdate showed the birth month was one month later than the actual one; his birth date showed one day later and his birth year was one year earlier than it should be. We don’t know how that happened but while D was in college he had to get his birth certificate fixed.

Another Estes type incident was on the forms I sent in I checked the proper places and filled in the proper lines. Yet when I got a preliminary form for the adoption papers, it gave his name properly but by the question Sex, the answer “Female” was typed incorrectly. When I told M about this, he laughed and said, “Yep, he is an Estes alright!”

So far their children’s names and birth certificates have been correct. I can’t wait to see what happens when they grow up.

2 thoughts on “One Son By Another Mother

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