I had just finished getting report on my assigned patients on a different floor from my usual cardiac patient floor. My report was just about finished when my patient — labeled “a difficult patient” — in room 205 requested her pain medicine and her medicine for itching. Pain and itching are not uncommon for a dialysis patient with nerve pain and half of a foot missing from diabetic complications. Report ended about 7:15 PM.
I quickly went to Ms. H’s room to assess her and her pain. Before I could introduce myself, this heavily aged forty year-old immediately began complaining. “They didn’t give me my medicine right. Nobody treats me right here.” I explained to her as I assessed her that I would check her medicine log to determine when the medicines had been given last and I told her I’d be right back.
Angrily she accused me. ” Yeah, you won’t be back until 9 o’clock like everybody else.” I assured her that I would be back quickly.
After promising that I would do my best to be back in a matter of minutes, I thought to myself, This patient has definite ‘trust issues’ — probably mad at the world due to her poor health problems, and feels hopeless of ever having a normal life. Perhaps she had grown up with dreams of accomplishing things like many others, only to have her whole life turned upside down by diabetes. So I quickly brought the medicines to her.
She started accusing me again. While I administered the requested and scheduled medicines, she started in again. ”You aren’t giving me the right medicine! You made me wait an hour for my pain medicine!”
I offered to let her look on the computer at the time and dose to lessen her suspicions. The time since report was only about 15 minutes. She continued to complain how I hadn’t treated her right. So I asked her, “Please tell me what I could have done differently? I have three other patients whom I could have seen before you, but I came to you first.”
She didn’t want to talk anymore. So as I gave her the medicines I told her, “I am sorry you are having such a rough time. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to have pain and be away from your home.” I paused a moment and added before I left, “In an hour I’ll be back to change the dressing on your foot.”
Again she started, “Yeah, you’re gonna put me off ’till last like everybody else does.”
“I am waiting an hour because I thought you would want to give the pain medicine time to work first before I changed your dressing. Do you want me to go ahead and change the dressing now?”
She decided she would wait for the dressing change.
Dialysis patients are supposed to be weighed daily and after each dialysis to help assess how much fluid needs to be drawn off. She had not been weighed at all, probably because she couldn’t stand well on one foot, or refused to be weighed, or the job just got handed from shift to shift and not done.
What she needed was a weight bed. The nurse tech found one next door, and we told our patient that we would switch beds for her later. A weight bed with a built in scale would make weighing her much easier.
So after assessing and medicating my other patients, the nurse tech and I got the empty weight bed from the next room and proceeded to exchange beds. I was teasing the nurse tech about something as we slid Ms. H over onto the new bed. As I started to pull the old bed out, it wouldn’t move. I realized I hadn’t unplugged it and said, ”Well, I guess it would help if I unplugged the bed first!”
Ahh! Ms. H. smiled!!! “The human connection and a sense of humor! I decided, she needed a little more laughter in her life. So the nurse tech and I kidded around some more and Ms. H actually laughed some.
Then it was time to change the dressing, which went smoothly. After cleaning up the room, she told me she hadn’t had a bath in two days. (I didn’t know if this were true or not.) It was time for report but my relief nurse was running late. So I helped Ms. H with a quick bath before my relief came. She seemed more content and wasn’t complaining anymore or accusing me of mistreating her. I finished her bath at 11:10PM.
Next week after working for three twelve hour shifts on my floor, I wanted to see how Ms. H was doing. I asked the nurse who had followed me how Ms. H. had been the rest of the night. The nurse replied that Ms. H. had slept all night. Ms. H. had been moved to another floor, but I had to find out where she had been moved because I was eager to see if she had felt better about her care. When I checked the computer I found out that Ms. H. had been discharged.
My heart sunk when I saw her address: “The Streets of Raleigh.” Her hospital stay may have been the first time she had slept on a soft mattress in a long time. What did she have to “go home to?” How long had it been since someone had shown her kindness? Looking back, I’m happy I chose to go above and beyond for Ms. H. I had no idea how much she truly needed it.
You never know why some people cross our path, but this is a perfect example of a good explanation. Ms. H will surely remember your kindness, and will reflect on the laughter your team provided. This was a wonderful post, and you are a wonderful person.
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Wow, thank you! I was taught as a kid to try to understand why people act the way they do. Appreciate your comments!!
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This post brought tears to my eyes. Ms H will never forget your patience, compassion, and kindness. You, my dear friend, are a stellar human being. What you personified is what I call the divinity of our humanity. I am so grateful for your presence. Love you bunches! MW
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Thank you so much for your kind words. I was fortunate enough to have truly good, loving parents. I feel that giving God’s love to others and helping them to know that He/She loves them no matter what is the very least that I can do. I really do love people and have always wanted to help where I can.
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You are doing a fantabulous job of passing the gifts of goodness and love forward. Every act of kindness has an incalculable ripple effect. ❤
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Thank you, Mother Wintermoon! That’s one of my goals. I may not be able to change the world, but if I can make someone smile or think better of someone or something, then my life’s purpose is being fulfilled.
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{{{<3}}}
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While living in Kentucky (until a couple of years ago, when I returned home to Australia) I spent nine days in a major regional hospital, some of that time in intensive care. I swore that if there was a next time I would choose death over hospital. Perhaps a few people like you working there may have made a difference to that opinion!
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Wow, thank you, Sir. There are more like me, but I hope you don’t ever have to go to a hospital again.
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I certainly hope so too , though it is highly unlikely I’ll ever return to the USA.
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How wonderful
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Thank you, Beth.
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Oh my….. there but for the grace of God. You did brighten her day and her life I think.
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Thank you, Anne. I hope so. Everyone needs some love, even the unlovable.
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This is so touching. We often don’t know until afterwards. God needs more kind acts shown spread around the world. Keep on spreading kindness. Hugs
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I agreed. My goal is to spread kindness as much as I am able. Thank you for commenting. Hugs!
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We are called to do the best we can for others, and you are definitely doing that! Great Blessings be upon you!
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Venus, thank you for your kind words. My goals in life are to be the best me that I can be and to share as much joy, wisdom, and love as I can. You are an astute observer of people and I bet a lover of people too. Thank you!
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