I can understand. My problem was my husband, who after 14 years of marriage, discovered he had diabetes. His personality changed and he had a severe stroke 10 years later. The brain MRI showed that he had had mini-strokes over the years after we married. After months of physical therapy, he recovered well enough to … More I Found Out Who I Am
This is the second letter to my younger self in an effort to understand who I am now better and perhaps to help someone else do the same. Hello, young Elaine. You have an exciting life ahead of you in school. You get your first taste of what it is like to live in the … More School Teaches Life Lessons
After my husband passed away in 2009, I stayed at our home and continued working at the hospital. Thankfully, he had suggested that I buy disability insurance through the hospital to cover my needs in the event of any future back problems. After H died, I received a check from the life insurance policy, which … More A New Life of Hope
I watched as she walked down the sidewalk, a neighbor and acquaintance. She was friendly, smiling, but was in her own world to some degree. We stopped to chat, since I felt I had known her from my past. We set a time to get together to learn more about each other. She was always … More I Was Once Her
After my husband passed away in 2009, my brother came and helped me rearrange and sort out my husband’s items and clothing. He helped me get a good handle on my life again. But my attitude about myself needed to expand to the freedom I needed in order to become the me that I was … More A New Attitude: Independent
My husband died in 2009 of heart failure. My life changed drastically for the better. Over the years I developed coping mechanisms to help protect myself and cope with my crumbling life. Now I am learning to overcome these “no longer needed” behaviors to be healthier mentally and emotionally. I am sharing these behaviors here to … More Peace With the Past Is Near
I have healed greatly from a long marriage to an emotionally abusive husband, who passed away after mini-strokes and finally heart failure in 2009. He changed over the years because of poorly controlled diabetes and mini-strokes, which showed up on his brain MRI. For me, it was an eye-opening experience to finally understand bit by … More Are You Being Abused?
I shared this post from my experiences in surviving abuse and some lessons I learned. After I began to learn to protect myself energetically, mentally, and emotionally during the later years of my marriage, I began to understand the very fact and degree that I had been abused. Realizing that I had denied it far … More The Beginnings of Healing
My husband recovered from the stroke and could walk with a cane. Since he worked on a computer, not being able to walk a lot was not an issue for his return to work. Over the next few years, he gained a lot of weight, some of it from fluid in his legs, which became … More My Last Days As His Wife
A beacon in the darkness Finally, after about fifteen years, one friend suggested that I read, “Women Who Run With Wolves” By Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes. As I read the book, I felt empowered and realized how I had given away everything that made me strong, independent, and “me.” (More about that later.) I began … More I Saw the Light (Part 2)
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