joyful2beeblogs

The little girl was hungry but didn’t want to wait for supper. She had had a rough day of learning not to hit her slightly older brother, who wouldn’t give her his toy. She had already played with her toys and wanted something different to play with.

Sylvie complained to her mother. “Why can Charlie play with that toy and I can’t? I am tired of my toys!”

As a mother who loved her children she wanted them to be happy. After all, any mother loves peace between her kids and quiet in the house when she has work to do. Mothers, like all good parents usually want to make everything better for their little ones, don’t they?

Mom recognized that Sylvie was a little tired and hungry; so she gave her a chocolate chip cookie to make her feel better and occupy her young daughter while she made supper. Sylvie ate her cookie and felt better, survivng the time until supper with a little more gracious attitude.

Mom was cleaning up the dishes; Daddy was tired and catching up on sports and the news. Brother Charlie was doing his homework. Sylvie felt lonesome. “Maybe a chocolate chip cookie would make me feel better,” she thought.

“May I have a chocolate chip cookie, please,” she requested ever so politely of her mother, hoping the “please” would add certainty to her obtaining her goal.

Mom saw that Sylvie was tired and on the edge of losing her battle to find someone or something new to do. So she offered, “Go get your pajamas on, put your toys away and then you may have a chocolate chip cookie!”

Sylvie’s prompt obedience was rewarded with a chocolate chip cookie.

Sylvie grew up a few more years. She came home from school upset that another girl had made fun of her. Sylvie had also not done well on a test. She came home and told her mother about her day. Mother listened to Sylvie’s sorrows. She hugged her and gave her something that would make those sad feelings go away: a brownie, fresh baked! Sylvie was thrilled. Mom felt that she had made her daughter feel happier.

No matter how old the children were, the mother, who loved her children just could not bear for her grown children to be sad, hurting or angry. Wasn’t it her responsibility to make things better; sad days happier; and grumpy kids content by giving them chocolate chip cookies, or brownies, or chocolate ice cream, or chocolate candy or a hug or attention?

Later, when the kids became adults, Mom tried to offer advice when the kids didn’t ask for it. (Sometimes we mothers try to help our kids; sometimes too often and too much. At some point the kids need to become adults and face problems on their own with a little encouragement maybe. What parent doesn’t want their child’s life to be happy and good?

What many parents don’t know is that chocolate has tryptophan in it. Tryptophan is an amino acid used by the brain to make serotonin, which creates a feeling of contentment and happiness.

Remember the endorphins that can decrease pain, lessen stress, even stir feelings of euphoria? Dark chocolate, more accurately cocoa, gives the most enodorphins; milk chocolate has them too but in less quantity but it does have sugar as well. Sylvie’s mother knew how chocolate affected herself and that it would help Sylvie feel better and more pliable when she was tired. What good parent doesn’t want there kids to be happy?

Parents make mistakes and sometimes do not realize how their words and actions may affect a child. Even though there have been books on raising children, there is no way to know if what they teach is right for all children who may have different personalities, sensitivities, or even needs. A lot of the time parents are “shooting in the dark” and they make mistakes or bad responses to situations simply because they are frustrated, tired, sleep deprived, upset about some other major issue or (face it) they aren’t perfect. They make mistakes, honest, emotional, frustrated, sometimes angry mistakes.

Realizing that what they said or did may have hurt their child’s feelings. So they try to add good experiences to hopefully balance the effects of their previous painful ones. In short they feel bad and try to make up for it or show the child they really do love them with treats, fun experiences, intimate family times and apologies.

My parents raised us kids with a lot of love and valuable experiences in learning about the world: through reading, creativity, travel, learning about other cultures; working together; how to get along; life in general; how to love and be loved; and of course how to have a spiritual life. They weren’t perfect, but whatever mistakes they made the above experiences enriched our lives so much that we hardly noticed the mistakes.

I am so thankful for my parents and the family I grew up in. We all grew up to be good, loving, honest people, which I am sure my parents would be proud of if they were here. We are each married, (I am widowed), each have worked hard to support our families, have been active in helping others through donating our time or resources to help others. We each connect with others and give help, affection or care to others. We are spiritual, loving, kind, intelligent, have hobbies, jobs, strength and wisdom to face the challenges of life. They did a good job!

I do still love chocolate but have learned to curb my appetite for it. My life is full of so many other enjoyable things.